Tuesday, April 11, 2006

Ted is a client that I would be better in not seeing, chief among several reasons is that I view him as the client most likely to gift me with a STD. But I’ll admit I like him, he reminds of the kind of guy who I was attracted to in high school and the kind of guy who convinced me my judgment was so poor (and treated me so shabbily) that I stuck to dating women in college.

I’ve seen him four times now, twice in NY and twice in London with the London meetings to accompany him to ‘swingers’ parties. At the first party it took me about fifteen minutes to have my curiosity satisfied and feel perplexed about what the attraction is.

Later, after retiring to our hotel, we lay in bed, Ted prattling on, the drinking and partying having sapped his performance potential but not his enthusiasm. I was half listening as he talked until he said “…and we can get married. Do you want to marry me?”

Me: “No.”

Him: “Why not? You like me don’t you?”

Me: “Yes, I like you but I don’t want to marry you.”

Him: “You can have anything you want. You can be my hot wife.”

Me: “I don’t want to be a hot wife.” He had the look of child whose parents told him he couldn’t have a puppy and then he laid back and fell asleep.

Marriage is probably in Ted’s future. Likely a blond shark in a mini skirt who figures she can put up with anything till the covenants of the pre-nup expire at which point she’ll divorce him, by then having left plenty of evidence of his infidelities. Even if she can’t make it till the expirations, the child support for the two or three kids she’ll have will provide a nice living even in Manhattan. And who knows, perhaps Ted will finally get it together and grow up. He could be a good guy if he were sober and had a purpose.

Be Ted’s hot wife? I’d rather throw myself into the Seine.



Anonymous Anonymous said...

I laughed at this entry! I live in New York and know so many men like Ted. I'd rather be a floater in the East River than be married to one. and I'm a blond shark in a tight skirt. Even we have our limits!

6:01 PM  
Blogger el Bow said...

on the river theme: I'd sooner throw you in the Tyne...

12:41 AM  
Anonymous VJ said...

Yes, very amusing. I almost imagine that as his standard proposal too. And hey, Ann Coulter's still single in NYC, right? That's about when you'd throw yourself in the river, right? Cheers & Good Luck! 'VJ'

5:02 AM  
Blogger Pete from Cal said...

Ah, good old Ted! I remember the first time you saw him and his "uninvited" friend showing up. Don't remember reading your subsequent visit with him that involved swingers parties. Hmm... I guess he has fallen for you perhaps? Glad you can keep a straight head and knows he's not the type for you. Take care!

8:54 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This entry made me also laugh. Ah, Ted. Ted, Ted, Ted.

- AthenaNY

5:49 PM  

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